02-14-2014, 10:29 PM
It's Valentine's Day, it's a full moon, and Ruby had to get up today and see people anyway. In other words, the normally holding-it-all-in Ruby's having difficulties with that already.
The first person she had to get up and see today was transparent. He was in bed with her, telling her how dead he was, and what was she going to do about it? As though she knows.
It's a good thing she's basically here to be seen and not heard, huh? They don't really want to hear from a cub, and that's all fine with Ruby, when the words likely to come out of her mouth threaten to betray more than a little of her mental state. Sometimes, it can be difficult to determine the sarcasm from the true statement when it comes to her, but when she says something like "Yeah, it's a fucking peachy day today," it's not at all difficult.
The part of these ceremonies that she waits for, the part that she dreads, is this part. The time when her will will be tested and thoroughly broken. Part of her likes losing control, oh yes it does. Part of her has to remind herself that it's okay to do so sometimes. Part of her doesn't believe that last bit at all.
It's always somewhat bittersweet, the release. It always brings back bad memories -- of watching powerless as her body does things outside of her own control, as though that were an excuse.
This time, there is no wind-up per se. The Wyrmfoe just up and hits someone. It starts as chaos. It will end in chaos. There will be blood on her hands again tonight, she thinks with her only remaining sensible thoughts.
She gives and gives and gives, this cub does. She may not have the others' gifts, but she has training and a fearless ferocity to her. And she's not afraid to die. At all. Eventually, throwing herself at the fray like that ends up with a thrown fist or rock (hard to tell, honestly) going headside, and all is blessedly quiet again.
The first person she had to get up and see today was transparent. He was in bed with her, telling her how dead he was, and what was she going to do about it? As though she knows.
It's a good thing she's basically here to be seen and not heard, huh? They don't really want to hear from a cub, and that's all fine with Ruby, when the words likely to come out of her mouth threaten to betray more than a little of her mental state. Sometimes, it can be difficult to determine the sarcasm from the true statement when it comes to her, but when she says something like "Yeah, it's a fucking peachy day today," it's not at all difficult.
The part of these ceremonies that she waits for, the part that she dreads, is this part. The time when her will will be tested and thoroughly broken. Part of her likes losing control, oh yes it does. Part of her has to remind herself that it's okay to do so sometimes. Part of her doesn't believe that last bit at all.
It's always somewhat bittersweet, the release. It always brings back bad memories -- of watching powerless as her body does things outside of her own control, as though that were an excuse.
This time, there is no wind-up per se. The Wyrmfoe just up and hits someone. It starts as chaos. It will end in chaos. There will be blood on her hands again tonight, she thinks with her only remaining sensible thoughts.
She gives and gives and gives, this cub does. She may not have the others' gifts, but she has training and a fearless ferocity to her. And she's not afraid to die. At all. Eventually, throwing herself at the fray like that ends up with a thrown fist or rock (hard to tell, honestly) going headside, and all is blessedly quiet again.